When I invite people to come over for a bonfire or dinner, it always comes with an attached issue- getting everyone to help tidy up the house before company comes. You all know what I am talking about- you see things you didn't notice all week that need cleaned, fixed or thrown away. It usually ends up being a great source of anxiety for me, ending in me thinking perfection will not be attained, therefore the visiting friends will never accept an invitation again.
Except for one small issue- no one really cares.
Really.
Seriously.
No one.
Saturday night we had some friends over for the first time- understand, we are not overly social entertainers. My kitchen isn't huge. There are always dishes in the sink. The TV is always on. There are journals and notebooks in every room of the house. My carpet needs replaced. My bathroom is always a mess from the two golden retreivers who are fed and watered in it. There is always laundry on our bed. We live in our own world here in our old farmhouse. Its called "this is not a museum we actually live in this space".
So I continue to struggle with the whole "how do other people do this" issue.
Then our company arrives, and through our friendship with them, I realize we do not have to be so perfect. There are much bigger things going on than the dog hair under the clawfoot tub in the bathroom. There are lives being entertwined through our childrens activities and our own reaching out. There were much bigger things than my house on the table on Saturday night. The laughter and ridiculousness of our kids making smores in the kitchen ( using a candle- don't ask) was just enough to let our hair down. The funny pictures on our phones of one another was a great sharing moment. The dark cloud of circumstance that hung over each of us as individuals gave way to some relaxation and laughter- alongside some buffalo chicken dip and dinner.
Through all of my frustrations of "entertaining" and all of my anxiety I am glad that my family could offer a bit of refuge in a weekend full of heartache and helplessness.
And I am glad to have made some new friends that can laugh with us when things aren't very funny, and will understand when we need to cry.
Praying for the friends who lost a very special lady this weekend.
Showing posts with label friendship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friendship. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
Friendship in Motion
Friendship in motion is something I refer to when a friendship I have is in a changing pattern. As we all know, not all friendships are beneficial to us , and not all friendships are a blessing forever. Sometimes, a friendship changes as the two friends grow and change, and it it is not always something that ends on a positive note.Sometimes a friendship moves forward, becomes deeper, is more of a blessing.
When you build a friendship with another person, I know it is a matter of trust, faith and personal connection. God provides us with learning experiences through our friendships, and sometimes we have to ask the tough questions when we have our doubts. As Christian women we are going to encounter several types of friendships that will be blessings, or lessons.
Over the next few Tuesdays, I would like to write more in depth about each of these types and maybe spark a conversation about the different practices in all of our friendships.
Some of these topics will include:
* Lifelong Friendships VS Seasonal Friendships
* Spiritual Friendships
* Mentoring Friendships
* Friendships with Non-Believers
* Friendships within the Family
If there are any others we run across we will tackle those as well.
Looking forward to discovering the best way for us to be the best friend we can be, regardless of the circumstance.
When you build a friendship with another person, I know it is a matter of trust, faith and personal connection. God provides us with learning experiences through our friendships, and sometimes we have to ask the tough questions when we have our doubts. As Christian women we are going to encounter several types of friendships that will be blessings, or lessons.
Over the next few Tuesdays, I would like to write more in depth about each of these types and maybe spark a conversation about the different practices in all of our friendships.
Some of these topics will include:
* Lifelong Friendships VS Seasonal Friendships
* Spiritual Friendships
* Mentoring Friendships
* Friendships with Non-Believers
* Friendships within the Family
If there are any others we run across we will tackle those as well.
Looking forward to discovering the best way for us to be the best friend we can be, regardless of the circumstance.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
A Little Thought About Friendship
Friendship is such an important thing for some people. The people you choose to be friends with become part of your life in some of the most intimate ways. You share secrets, experiences, sometimes vacations. You also share grief, sadness, heartache and loss. There are holidays, birthdays, impromptu gatherings, and on occassion just a bottle of wine.
Another part of friendship is disappointment. Unfortunatly, not any relationship is perfect, and not every person understands how important little things in friendship mean to others. Like making plans and looking forward to them, only having them to change unexpectantly, leaving one person disappointed. This happens a lot when one friend has younger children. Don't get me wrong, I love the kids of all my friends, and most of them are younger. My children are teenagers, and I sometimes need more grown up time. This is hard to do when there are toddlers and elementary aged kids around.
Another aspect of friendship that is hard is the difference in faith two friends may or may not have. I feel like I have different relationships with my Christian girlfriends than with my non christian ones. I am not a different person, but I feel like I let my guard down a bit more with the ones who are Christian. They have a better understanding of my trials and triumphs, and the faith it takes to deal with all of those things. I also feel like I am not a great person to be ministering to the non christian ones either, because they can be judgmental at times, knowing my past and mistakes I have made.
When it is all said and done, I guess I am grateful that my best friend is my husband. He is the source for my laughter, happiness and aggravation- what more could a girl want? He also is a very good man, knows all of my secrets- and loves me unconditionally. And he has never broken my confidence, plans with me or brought any extra kids (other than my own).
Another part of friendship is disappointment. Unfortunatly, not any relationship is perfect, and not every person understands how important little things in friendship mean to others. Like making plans and looking forward to them, only having them to change unexpectantly, leaving one person disappointed. This happens a lot when one friend has younger children. Don't get me wrong, I love the kids of all my friends, and most of them are younger. My children are teenagers, and I sometimes need more grown up time. This is hard to do when there are toddlers and elementary aged kids around.
Another aspect of friendship that is hard is the difference in faith two friends may or may not have. I feel like I have different relationships with my Christian girlfriends than with my non christian ones. I am not a different person, but I feel like I let my guard down a bit more with the ones who are Christian. They have a better understanding of my trials and triumphs, and the faith it takes to deal with all of those things. I also feel like I am not a great person to be ministering to the non christian ones either, because they can be judgmental at times, knowing my past and mistakes I have made.
When it is all said and done, I guess I am grateful that my best friend is my husband. He is the source for my laughter, happiness and aggravation- what more could a girl want? He also is a very good man, knows all of my secrets- and loves me unconditionally. And he has never broken my confidence, plans with me or brought any extra kids (other than my own).
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